Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?