ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
