who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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