YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Your cock deserves a montage
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
