Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
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He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM VODKA MAN
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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