brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Randomize
