you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
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I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
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I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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