She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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