they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
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