HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Quick, to the slutcave!
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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