They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
