How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize