i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize