There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
