So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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