plz talk dirty to me
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
