On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
The Olympian is in my bed
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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