i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
21 Bartenders That Are Definitely Winning At Their Jobs
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.