yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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