There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
