And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
