end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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