Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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