I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
