yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Randomize