Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Randomize