You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
