So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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