i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
