Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
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