there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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