It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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