oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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