Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
