You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
