I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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