If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
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