First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
