so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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