i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
