She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
