I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
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