i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize