i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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