Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
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