It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I'm at about main and main street
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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