Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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