Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
