its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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