this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
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